I didn't shave. On purpose
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
