Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Screwed.edu
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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