He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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