is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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