I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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