4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize