Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
