I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
