just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
