these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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