Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
