I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize