Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize