just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
