sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
