Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
We left an ass print on the piano.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
