He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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