road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
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