The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize