You really coming over, don't trick.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i just google imaged poop.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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