dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
