How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
