okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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