best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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