I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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