You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
