Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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