And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
There r osticjed everywhere
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
