you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
smell my finger.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
