she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize