Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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