So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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