Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
