Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
