Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
