Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
