Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
