he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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