my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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