So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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