Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
