The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I'm getting married
To pizza
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
