I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
