i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
