I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
