About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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