I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
