My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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