He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You can't just leave with hair like that
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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