I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize